MILKSHAKES: CLASSIC AND NOT

I think the fact that I made five different rounds of milkshakes shows my dedication to the great pursuit of culinary excellence.  I know it doesn't sound that impressive, but making five full servings of milkshakes (that's fifteen scoops of ice cream!) in one sitting left me sick as a dog.  A dog who is now eating grass because he ate 15 scoops of ice cream. 

But in the moment, I was 8 years old again and I had just gotten home from school.  I brought a friend with me, for a very rare and very special school night sleepover, and we drop our bags in the kitchen. My dad gives me a big hug and a salty kiss (probably from eating sunflower seeds) and asks the best question ever: "So, what kind of milkshake would you ladies like?"

My friend takes this as a joke, because in her house TV is limited to one hour a day and soda is verboten.  She then sees me open the candy drawer and pull out a red licorice.  Yes, my dad furnished a candy drawer, which eventually became a legend among  the neighborhood kids.  He also bought us marshmallow fluff and would pump whipped cream into our mouths using those nitrogen fueled bottles. It was like having Santa Claus for a dad every day. In short, it was wonderful.

For his famous milkshakes, he always added half a banana for thickness and texture, and a whole raw egg to emulsify and enrich it.  Somehow this made them taste vaguely healthy, rather than a sugar orgy with a dash of cream.  So if you have any little ones you want to spoil, or even if you want to spoil yourself, here are some of my favorite versions of the classic milkshake.

American Classic

This is my dad's version, that he'd make for my sister and me after school.  It's perfect and simple and will always be my favorite.

Ingredients:

3 large scoops vanilla ice cream

1/2 ripe banana

1 egg

Dash of milk

Directions:

Plop everything in a blender and puree until thick and smooth.

Aussie Classic

Being half Australian, I grew up putting Milo on my ice cream the way kids would add sprinkles or chocolate syrup.  It's basically a malted chocolate milk "energy" drink with awesome 80s graphic design.  Visitors from down under know they have to bring a pack for us or possibly find themselves unceremoniously turned out on the LA streets. 

Ingredients:

3 large scoops vanilla ice cream

1/2 ripe banana

1 egg

Dash of milk

1/4 cup Milo (or Ovaltine)

Directions:

Plop everything in a blender and puree until thick and smooth.

American Apple Pie

This is basically apple pie ala mode via a blender, so what's not to love?  The apple pie filling is also wonderful served warm with ice cream on the side, or as filling in a quick puff pastry turnover.  

Ingredients:

1/4 cup light brown sugar

2 tablespoons all-purpose flour

1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon, plus more for sprinkling

Freshly ground nutmeg, to taste

4 medium apples peeled, cored and thinly sliced

1/2 lemon, zested and juiced

3 large scoops vanilla ice cream

Directions:

Heat oven to 425 F.  Mix everything except for the ice cream in a casserole dish, cover with aluminum foil and pop in the oven for 35 minutes, or until everything is soft and juicy. Wait for the apple mixture to cool. Plop about 1/2 a cup of apple mixture per milkshake, plus the ice cream, in a blender and puree until thick and smooth.

Smores

Ever since I had a toasted marshmallow shake at Spike's Good Stuff Eatery in DC, I couldn't stop thinking out it.  I took it to the next level and added dark chocolate chips, and a graham cracker topping.  The burnt marshmallows add a delicious smoky flavor that is as unexpected as it is addicting.

Ingredients:

3 marshmallows

2 tablespoons chopped dark chocolate

3 large scoops vanilla ice cream

1 graham cracker

1 egg

Directions:

Torch the marshmallows over an open flame until black on the outside and liquid in the middle. Plop everything, except the cracker, in a blender and puree until thick and smooth. Garnish with graham crackers.

Inverted Rootbeer Float

I love the dark licoracey flavor of rootbeer, and that weird crunchy shell that grows around the ice cream the longer you leave it sitting in the float.  So for this milkshake, I decided to make a little twist and turn the whole thing inside out.  By reducing the rootbeer down to a syrup, you get concentrated rootbeeriness, and by topping it off with a little of the fizzy stuff you get your ice cream crunch.  Everyone's a winner.

Ingredients:

1 bottle of root beer

3 large scoops vanilla ice cream

1 egg

Directions:

Pour half of the bottle of rootbeer into a saucepan and reduce by half over medium heat.  Let the mixture cool completely. Put the reduction, ice cream, and egg in a blender and puree until thick and smooth. Pour into a glass and top off with a dash of rootbeer.